#88

The starting Tight End for the New York Jets - Robert Wnorowski!!

...one can dream

Single vs. In a Relationship

I think I'm really getting tired of being single. The thing is, every time I'm in a relationship, it ends as a complete and utter disaster. I'm weighing the pros and cons of being single and being in a relationship - with the help of my super crazy awesome friend, Fiesta (http://fiestas-fiesta.tumblr.com/) - I just thought it was interesting enough to share with all of Blogworld.


Relationships 

Pros:
Sex.
Somebody to talk to, ALWAYS.
Somebody is always there for you.
Sex.
Rarely a dull moment.
Cuddling (no homo).
Sex.

Cons:
Can't go out with the guys as often as you'd wanna.
Can't hang out with girls like you used to.
Weekends are automatically committed to the significant other.
The breakup.
That lovely time of the month.
The withholding of sex every time you fuck up.

Single 

Pros:
Freedom
Doing whatever you want without having to worry about hurting a partners feelings.
Promiscuous sex.
No compromising.
The ability to have many many friends of opposite sex and talk to whoever you want.
Don't have to spend time on the relationship.
Don't have to spend money on the relationship.
GUYS NIGHTS.
No stress.
 
Cons:
Can be lonely - especially around the holidays and when you see couples all lovey dovey and shit.
Less regular sex.
Don't get love / deep emotion with another person.
Can be boring sometimes.
Less regular sex.



After much debate, I think I just need a friend with benefits. This chart explains it all:

Wigila

Wigilia is the traditional Christmas Eve vigil supper in Poland, held on December 24. The term is also often extended to the whole day of the Christmas Eve, extending further into the midnight Mass held at Roman Catholic churches all over Poland and large Polish comunities worldwide at midnight preceding the Christmas Day. In this usage, the supper itself is rather called "wieczerza" or "wieczerza wigilijna", using an Old Polish word meaning "dinner", "large supper", stemming from Proto-Indo-European root *vesper - evening.

The word "Wigilia" derives from the Latin verb vigilare, "to watch", and literally means 'eve'. The feasting traditionally begins once the first star has been sighted (usually by children) in the heavens at dusk (around 5 p.m.). Therefore Christmas is also sometimes called "Gwiazdka" (the little star, referring to the Star of Bethlehem).

Traditions and customs

 

Children usually decorate the Christmas tree on this day (if it has not been set up before).

One tradition is leaving one extra empty place setting for a stranger, called the "Unexpected Guest". This is to celebrate the tradition of hospitality in Poland. The extra seat was left open just in case a traveler, family member, or a friend appeared at the door, so there would be a place for them to sit. It also represents a place for family members who have died or, in some traditions, symbolizes hospitality for baby Jesus.

Family members begin the celebration with a prayer and breaking of the Christmas wafer (opłatek - symbolizing the bread eaten daily — our day-to-day common life) and wishing each other good fortune in the upcoming new year. (After the prayer, usually done by the man of the house, the opłatek is broken and pieces are given to everyone attending the table. From there, everyone breaks off a piece of their opłatek, and shares it with everyone else, wishing luck and joy in the upcoming year, for Christ has been born. This wish is usually finalized by a kiss on the cheek.) Readings from the Bible concerning the nativity of Jesus are practiced in more religious households. In the countryside, it is customary to feed livestock (though not dogs, cats, and other pets) with the wafer, as the animals of the household are to be treated as people that day and are traditionally believed to speak with a human voice.

The evening supper

 

After first star appears on sky and sharing the opłatek, the supper begins. The number of dishes is traditionally the number of expected guests plus one. The number of courses is traditionally established to be either twelve or an odd number (in Silesia)twelve is symbolic of the number of months in the year is good as well as to celebrate the twelve disciples of Jesus.

Wigilia is observed as a Black Fast, and as such Poles abstain from eating meat on this day. Traditional dishes include żurek, siemieniotka (in Silesia), red beet soup barszcz with uszka (small dumplings), mushroom soup, herring in oil, carp fillet, carp in aspic, potatoes, different salads, pierogi filled with potatoes, cheese, mushrooms and cabbage (kapusta), or cabbage and yellow peas, gołąbki (stuffed cabbage) kluski with poppyseed, kutia, makowki, and dried fruit compote.

Christmas carols are also sung. Some families attend the traditional midnight mass/Shepherd's Mass (pasterka).

Another major part of the Wigilia festivities is the opening of gifts. The children often open their gifts and hand out the gifts for the adults from under the tree. The gift-giver in Polish tradition is Saint Nicholas or the Gwiazdka,the Star of Bethlehem.
It is still believed that whatever happens on Wigilia has an impact on the following year. So, if a quarrel should arise, it foretells a quarrelsome and troublesome year.



I was never a huge fan of Wigilia, but I'm kinda looking forward to it this year. Some of the food is really disgusting, but hey, it's tradition. Hopefully this year will be a good one.

Wesołych Świąt Everyone!

Secret Santa

Mike K: Who doesn't wanna be a part of Secret Santa?

Mike Yao: I don't, fuck that shit!

Mike K: Why not?

Robert: It's Secret Santa, not Secret Buddha!

I love you, Mike Yao!

Sidekick

I just ordered the new Blackberry Bold 9700. I'm so sick of the Sidekick that I needed a change. I've had a Sidekick since 2005 so this is gonna be a tough switch. Hopefully I don't regret it.

Happy Trails, Sidekick!

Best Duo Ever

I just realized that me and Niall are like a modern day Laurel and Hardy. We're like every single motherfucking famous duos in history:

Abbot and Costello
Barney and Fred
Bill and Ted
Beavis and Butthead
Ben and Jerry
Bert and Ernie
Barnes and Noble
Batman and Robin
Bugs and Daffy
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
Cain and Abel
Cheech and Chong
Chip and Dale
Dharma and Greg
Dolce and Gabbana
Dumb and Dumber
Fact and Fiction
Jack and Jill
Jay and Silent Bob
Jekyll and Hyde
Johnson and Johnson
Ketchup and Mustard
Laurel and Hardy
Lenny and Carl (I'm Carl)
Lewis and Clark
Lilo and Stich
Mario and Luigi
Matt and Jeff Hardy
Mickey and Goofy
Penn and Teller
Pinky and the Brain
Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton
Red and Yellow M&M
Ren and Stimpy
Rocky and Bullwinkle
Salt and Pepper
Seth and Evan from Superbad
Shaun of the Dead and his Fat Friend
Spongebob and Patrick
Starsky and Hutch
Thelma and Louise 
Tom and Jerry
Tweedledee and Tweedledum
Yin and Yang
Zig and Zag
Niall Motherfucking Rouse and Robert Fucking Wnorowski

March of the Wooden Soldiers

This was one of my favorite movies growing up. It really did creep me out though. I used to watch this movie every Thanksgiving since I can remember. It's on TV now so I just had to take a break for nostalgic purposes.


















I love Laurel and Hardy.

My New Credo

All you got to do is use your instincts. How do you think a lion knows to tackle a gazelle? It's written, it's a code written in his DNA, says, "Tackle the gazelle." And believe it or not, in every man there's a code written that says, "Tackle drunk bitches."

-Romany Malco in the 40 Year Old Virgin.

#

Pick a number

Add 5

Multiply it by 2

Subtract 4

Divide by 2

Subtract the Original Number

Add 5

Did you get 8?

You like that shit, don't you?

Happy Birthday to Me!

I only want one thing for my Birthday. But shhhh!! If I say it out loud, it won't come true.

Kocham Cie, Tatusz!

Dirk Wnorowski?

A bunch of people keep telling me I look like Dirk Nowitzki . I kinda see it, but my head is a lot bigger.

Get this; I'm the one on the right!

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers!

So I just ordered the Power Rangers Movie from Amazon.com. It was 9 bucks - I totally had to!

It's one of my Birthday presents to myself. 

New York?

So I just finished watching the Eagles-Giants game and I'm really shocked how many people - from New York - were going for the Eagles. I'm not a Giants fan, but it really surprises me how many New Yorkers hate New York teams. This doesn't go for just the Eagles. I know a bunch of New Yorkers who are fans of the;

Patriots
Dolphins
Eagles
Cowboys
Red Sox
Phillies
Celtics
Devils

I don't know, I just don't get it. I understand that you're entitled to be a fan of any team, but it just surprises me how many New Yorkers are fans of rival New York teams.







FACKKKK THE PAYTRIOTSSSS!!!!!!!

Black Rob

Black Rob was my nickname in High School. Not sure why, but I fucking loved it. When I did this, I automatically thought of Humanities Prep. We definitely need a Prep reunion sometime soon.

After all, Rob keeps it gully.

Dexter

So me, Niall, and Denise just finished watching the Season Finale of Dexter. That episode was too fucking good! I really don't get how the show keeps getting better season after season. It flabbergasts me! I can't wait for Season 5!

Goldilocks

So a shitload of people have been telling me how much they love my hair. What's the secret to my precious golden locks?

Herbal Essences - Hello Hydration

That's right, I'm comfortable with my sexuality to admit that I, Robert Wnorowski, use Herbal Essences.

Don't hate!

Mike Collins' Poetry Hour#4

He's back!!!!

Talib Kweli

Please, for-real talk, casually fucking some vampire guys is a monstrosity, stop, not the real way to make it unwrong, believe me, justice is imaginary

Please stop killing imaginary monsters, vampires are not real, make believe, it is the wrong way, and just casually talk to some fucking guys for me

Please it is wrong, four vampiric guys, imaginary ways, unjust casual killings, made a real monstrous sum, talk to me and fucking believe

-Mike Collins

The Silence of my Vagina

-Mike Collins

A Haiku

Boy, name was Molly
I believe, suck’d a mean cock,
Not that I would know…

-Mike Collins

Home Alone

I seriously love when no one is home. It allows me to walk around the house butt-naked. I'm totally serious! I'm actually butt-naked while typing this.

I love my body - even though no one else does.

ATM

So last night I was heading home and really had to pee. I went inside a deli and they were like, "Nope, sorry." So I got pissed and just left looking for somewhere else to go. I was heading to McDonalds and I realized that I just couldn't make it. I went to an ATM, pretended I was withdrawing money, and I just took a huge piss.



Here's a picture of that bad boy!

Oh, what a night!

Ra-Ra-Ah-Ah-Ah, Roma, Ro-Ma-Ma, Gaga, Ooh La La!

I honestly think I'm gonna put my dick in a hot cup of coffee if I hear Poker Face, Paparazzi, or Bad Romance one more time.

Lady Gaga is alright, but those three songs are on the radio nonstop and it's getting ridiculous!

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

My mom says me and him are identical twins.



I'm kinda looking forward to Christmas. I'm getting into the Christmas spirit.

Cooper Football

Today was one of the funnest games at Cooper Park. The field was complete and utter shit - puddles everywhere! We made the most of it though. We played two games, and both games were so much fun - even though we lost the second one. Everyone was sliding all over the place and it was all so discombobulated. I did have three touchdowns and a couple of takeaways. And I also stiff-armed someone the same way Adrian Peterson did against the Browns.



Motherfuckers can't guard me!

Fiesta also laid Niall out! Niall seems to get laid out more often than not as of recent.


TRAVIS OLMEDA ISN'T SHIT!

<3

We actually took a group picture.



Leave it to me to fuck it up.

I christen these two games the Cooper Park Mud Bowl!

Darrelle Revis

"Two-Thirds of the Earth is covered by water, the other third is covered by Darelle Revis."

-Trey Wingo



He's the only reason why I didn't start T.O. in my fantasy football league. He's most certainly the best cornerback in the league.


The Jets playoff hopes are still alive - very slim, but still alive! Even though their schedule is ridiculously hard, I'm staying optimistic.

Wisdom Teeth

FUCK THE PATRIOTS!!!!

I love seeing a Patriots loss almost as much as I love watching a Jets win.

Oh yea, I'm drinking that Haterade - AND I FUCKING LOVE IT!

Top 5 Hated Patriots:

Bill Belichick - The cutoff sleeve sweatshirt makes you look like a douchebag
Tom Brady - Someone needs to hit him so hard that he can never fucking walk again
Randy Moss - That beard makes you look like a pedophile
Teddy Bruschi - I hope he gets another stroke
Junior Seau and his pathetic TV show Sports Jobs

Fucking cawksukkas!

That's my rant.







....fuck you Giselle.

Shoo Fly, Don't Bother Me!

I was taking a leak and a fly flew into my piss stream and drowned. NO JOKE!


Fucker got the business!

...or should I say Piss-ness!?

Woodhull Hospital

My mom, uncle, and myself were in the car and we drove past Woodhull Hospital. My mom goes to my uncle, "That's where Robert was born. Maybe that's why he's so ghetto."

Even my mom knows I'm a thug.

It also explains my love for black girls.

Babies

I don't know what it is, but it seems to be that infants fucking hate me. Whenever I see a cute kid on the train, I try to make it smile or laugh. The end result is the baby ends up crying and me feeling like a complete asshole. I don't know what it is - I seriously fucking don't. I see people making stupid faces at kids and the baby is all shits and giggles. But when I fucking do it, the baby starts hysterically crying. I mean come on! I don't think I'm that ugly. What am doing to make this kid hate me and start crying? One day, I promise I'll make a baby laugh. Practice makes perfect. I don't care if I have to make ten, even a hundred children cry, I WILL MAKE A BABY GO SHITS AND GIGGLES!

It's shit like this that makes me fucking hate children. I guess I just don't get kids.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I fucking love Thanksgiving. It's one of my all-time favorite holidays. Mainly due to the food and the company. This is gonna be a crappy one though. It's the second time in 3 years that I'm spending Thanksgiving in the hospital - it's basically a tradition now - fuckin' a. Hopefully I make the best of it. Even though it's been a rough year, I still gotta buttload to be thankful for....

Family
Friends
Health
Football
Atomic Wings
The New York Jets
All the New Friends I made
Columbia?

Thanksgiving officially starts at 12:30. Then it's football and food all motherfucking day!

Math

"What's 3+6?"

"Is it 9?"

"Congratulations! You just passed Polish Calculus!"

?

Who wants to go to a Jets game at Gillette Stadium next year? I am 100% serious! It's about a year away so that's plenty of time for you motherfucks to get some money and think about it. I think it would be so bad ass going to a Jets-Patriots game in New England.

Me and Niall couldn't even watch the game. We ended up going to the city when we saw it was 21-0. It was the first time since I don't know when that I didn't finish watching the Jets game. On a side note, I did get new shoes. Woohoo!



I seriously hate the Patriots so fucking much!

Joke of the Week

So Jesus and Moses are in Heaven and they get bored. Moses asks Jesus, "Hey, wanna go for a vacation?" Jesus says sure. With a snap of his fingers, Jesus and Moses are on a boat in the middle of the ocean. After a couple of beers, Moses goes to Jesus and says, "Remember this?" and he waves his hands and parts the water. Jesus is laughing his ass off and goes, "You remember this?" and he steps out of the boat.

1 step, 2 step, and he falls in.

Moses helps him back in the boat. Jesus says, "Woah, let me try that again!" He takes a step out of the boat.

1 step, 2 step, and he falls in again.

Moses helps him back in the boat again. Jesus says, "Hold on, one more time! It has been 2,000 years." He takes another step out of the boat.

1 step, 2 step, and he falls in again for the third time.

Moses helps him back in and says, "You know Jesus, 2,000 years ago you didn't have those holes in your feet."







ZING!

Don't get offended. I'm Catholic and I love that joke.

X Marks the Spot!

So I drew a little pirate map on myself today during work - as seen above. When we were out with the guys at Atomics, Peter asked me about it. I showed him the whole thing and then I said, "X marks the spot!" and I slapped the shit out of him! Then he pursued to salt me.



Totally worth it.







I fucking love Atomic Fridays.

Pimp My Ride

Me and Niall saw this on our way to Greenpoint.


I don't know whether this is a hipster or a hillbilly pickup truck - you can never tell the difference between the two sometimes.

Where's Xzibit when you need him?

Story of My Life

My mind is way too fucking active. I tend to over think everything and I hate that I do. Whenever I start over thinking, I get super pessimistic regarding the matter at hand - even though things usually end up okay. I seriously feel like I'm gonna have a fucking meltdown in the not-so-distant-future. That or go into a state of total depression. All because I can't stop over thinking shit. Story of my fucking life. I'm really not big on showing emotions. So I guess I gotta just keep making cheesy jokes and try to keep my mind off of things.

Where do Polish people keep their armies?

















In their sleevies.

HI-5

So me and Niall were walking around aimlessly and we stop by Kings Pharmacy because we really wanted to buy and action figure so we could set on fire (for nostalgic purposes). While we were heading there, we saw this sign. It was shaped like an atom bomb and it said HI-5, so I just had to have it! We both just looked at each other and said, "Sign?!" and we both knew were taking it. We end up heading back home because we realize we need scissors to cut it down - plus we both really had to take a shit for we just had some Taco Bell. After a 20 minute intermission, we head back to Bedford between Nth 3rd and 4th, wait til some people walk by, and I give him a boost and he cuts that shit down. IT WAS AWESOME!



DIPSET!

Is It Just Me

Or do the new ads for the Alvin Ailey Dance Studio look a lot like Adrian Peterson?



I'm not the only one who sees it, am I?

New Moon

New Moon ain't got shit on me Gennaro and Mike. New Moon - get it?



I love how Mike looks hypnotized by my pasty white ass.

The x-rated version coming soon!

I Don't Even Like Basketball

But Damn!!!!



Varejao's mad cuz Wade is stylin on him!

OH YOU MAD!

I Just Had To!

Are you a pie?

Because you make my Banana Cream!








Credit to Fiesta!

New Addiction

I'm in love - even though I fucking suck at it.

Friday Night

Friday night can be described by four words:

Atomic Wings

and....

GET HYPHY!!!!

<3

Did You Know?

Did you know that the S. in Harry S. Truman stands for S.? His middle name is just a letter. That's kind of bad ass. I was gonna say that's just like Homer's name - but his full name is Homer Jay Simpson.

I'm gonna get a letter middle name. How does Robert O. Wnorowski sound? ROBERT O! O. ROBERT! Get it?

Yes, this is how fucking bored I get.

P.S. I got Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2. Shit is sick! Even though I suck balls at it. I needed something to hold me over until I figure out what to do with my Madden.

Bedford Preacher

I fucking hate this guy, but this was really interesting. He definitely has a problem though, I just thought he was an annoying motherfucker who craved to have his voice heard. He has the Anderson's though, so he gets two points there.


Study For "A Moral Society" from russel fong on Vimeo.

Quite a Dilemma

Decisions! Decisions!

RAWR!!!!

Normally I'd like to think I'm a nice guy. But I seriously have a horrible temper when it comes to two things; sports and video games. Sports I can understand due to man's primitive and competitive nature. I guess video games can fall within the same criteria, but seriously, I don't understand why I get so fucking pissed playing Gears of War 2, Madden, Halo, etc. It was never that bad until this year. Within the span of 10 months, I've broken:

2 Headsets
2 Controllers
My Madden (just happened today due to me actually punching the shit out of my X Box last night)
My X Box (not due to punching the shit out of it)

I seriously think I have a problem. The worst part is that - no matter how much I spend - I will never learn.

I'm either getting a new Madden or a Modern Warfare 2 tomorrow. I'll probably end up breaking it eventually though.

I think Niall sums it up pretty well HERE!

No Shave November

I'm gonna end up looking like Moses come November's end. Hopefully the patches are gone! It's only four days in and I'm already sick of it. But I must prevail! Let the hair growing begin (©Danny)! I'll keep you posted.

Brooklyn Hospital

Brooklyn Hospital is most certainly a weird place. Weird isn't the right word, but I don't know what else I should say. I had a doctor's appointment on Friday and I have TWO stories to tell!

Okay, so I go to Brooklyn Hospital, sign in, and then I just sit down in the waiting room. I'm sitting like three seats away from this elderly black guy and I notice that his shoe is untied. So - of course - I said to him, "Excuse me sir, your shoe's untied." He looks down and notices is. Then he says, "Oh yea?!". He then goes down to his other shoe - the one that is tied - and he unties it dramatically! Then he says, "Take that, CRACKER!" I was literally flabbergasted! I didn't know what the fuck to say, I was just in shock.

While I'm still waiting, I ask out loud if anyone has a pen. I have a newspaper with me and I wanna do my Sudoku puzzles. So this girl comes up to me and hands me a pen. I thank her and think that's the end of it, but it was only the beginning. She starts talking to me. I try to pay her no mind because I'm really into my Sudoku, but then again I have to pay some attention to her since she gave me the pen. She asks me what I'm here for and I tell her that I'm here for my knees. I ask her the same question, and she tells me she has Lupus! I didn't know much about the disease, but I do know that it's an autoimmune disorder. I thought it was like AIDS so I was honestly kinda creeped out. I felt so bad for her! Then I realize that she's flirting with me, which creeped me out even more! She asked me if I had a girlfriend. I told her I did, and she looked DEVASTATED! I felt even worse! Then there was an awkward silence and eventually my doctor comes out and calls me in. Talk about perfect timing! I thank her for the pen, give it back to her, and walk away. I felt so horrible!

I ended up getting a pen from the receptionist. And funny enough, it's a pen with a BMI indicator on it. When I go to check mine, it was all in the red. Red = Bad. She basically told me to lose some weight. Fucking bitch!



On a lighter note, I did end up finishing the Sudoku puzzles. And it made me realize that if I play my cards right, I will never have to pay for a pen ever again. Woohoo!



This place gives me the heebie-jeebies!

Joke of the Week

I'm gonna try to do one of these each week. Stay posted!!

Funniest Thing I've Heard All Day!

Q: What word has the most letters in it?

A: Mailbox


I was in my doctor's office and I happened to pick up Highlights - the childrens magazine. I read that and it had me bursting out in laughter. Everyone was looking at me. By the way, I also found all the hidden items in the picture! Oh how I miss that magazine.









I'm almost done with my Columbia Application. And when I do finish, I promise much more posts!

No, Seriously

I think I might be going to hell for laughing at this. I actually prayed for forgiveness afterwards.



50 seconds in is my favorite part.

C'MON SON!

WOOPS, I mean....


Get the fuck outta here with that bullshit!

For those who have no idea what the fuck I'm talking about, CLICK HERE!

Atomic Wings

Atomic Wings is turning into one of my favorite places in the world. The past 3-4 weekends me and the guys have been going there. Fiesta, Danny, and myself initially set up the first trip - and now it has become a weekly endeavor. I don't know how, but I always lose my voice after Atomic Wings. The food is amazing, but the company is what makes it so bad ass - no homo. If you haven't come with us and we actually like you, then I suggest you come ASAP. The more the merrier.




P.S. Fuck Team Scooted! <3

January Jones-Wnorowski

After reading her interview in this months GQ (yea I read GQ, sue me!), January Jones is my new favorite woman of all time! I sincerely think I'm in love. Her Sundays consist of drinking beer and watching football! GET THIS - she's gonna be Troy Polamalu for Halloween! That's even more bad ass than what me and Niall are gonna be! Oh man, I can already picture us hanging out on the couch, watching the Jets and Bears game and throwing back a couple of brews. I really gotta catch up on Mad Men. I miss me some Betty Draper!

Seriously, will you marry me?

Catholic School Girls Rule!

This is a convo between me and Fiesta....

R:Yo
R:Does this make me a pedophile?
R:I saw some catholic high school girls in their uniforms and was like damn!
R:I miss those days
F:ye....
F:NO
F:I'd punch a baby in the face before passing up on a catholic school girl. No joke!

I love this kid.

Social Experiment # 1

So I was bored one day at school and decided to write something on the bathroom walls. I wrote, "I love shitting here! - 9/24/09" I really wanted to see what kind of reaction I would get. My hypothesis was that people would tag up the walls no matter what, but I figured there would be at least some mention of how awesome it is to shit there. They will tag up for two reasons;
1) They will want to put in their two cents.
2) People want their voice heard no matter where they are.
3) It really is the best place to take a dump on campus!


Here are the results...

My initial things that I wrote:





Eventually there was more:







I went in last week to see how it was going and the cleaning crew decided to paint over it.... fuckers! Fortunately, the movement did not die. I went in there today to check on it. Here are my findings:







In conclusion, my hypothesis was correct! People who see something written on the walls - even something about taking a dump - will want to put in their input and be heard.... no matter where they are. Overall, I must say this was a successful experiment. Although I did not take in to consideration that the cleaning crew would paint over it. I wanted to record my progress over the whole semester and have a whole mural dedicated to how awesome it is to poop there. I'm not sure whether I should just finish my experiment or continue with it til the end of the semester. Your two cents will be greatly appreciated!

I just realized I have one of my college professors as a friend on Facebook (where I always post links to my blog) Hopefully you'll appreciate the social experiment, and not see it as vandalism, Professor Symister! After all, you are a Psychology professor!

R.I.P.

This is indeed a sad day for me. I have lost such a great friend. I think sharing my grief would help me ease my burdens.

Me and the Santana's met right before graduation when my friend, Michael introduced me to them, along with the Melvins and the Dontrelles for $250. At first, we weren't close at all. Slowly but surely we became inseparable. Everywhere I went, they were right there with me. I still remember when they got their first scuff. We were playing football at the lot and I dragged my toes and messed up the front. At first I thought that was gonna be the end of them, but their flaws just made me love them more and more. Eventually there were more scuffs and more hardships. I wasn't going to abandon them. They were in such pain that I had to clip their wings. I knew they were gonna have to be put down, but I just couldn't force myself to do that.

Then came the day.

The left got caught on something and got a huge hole in it. I still wasn't ready to let them go, but eventually the hole just kept getting worse and worse. I didn't want to, but I knew it was time.


I am just thankful for all the special moments that the Santana's and I shared together. And with that, I hope that they will continue to live on in my heart and in my mind.

I still cannot believe that you're gone.

Bills vs. Jets

The Bills vs. the Jets was one of the most disappointing games I have ever seen! It's days like these that make me hate being a Jets fan. The funniest part of that horrid showing was all the texts and ims I was sending and receiving. It's funny how quick the mood changed....

Here are some texts and ims:

-Jets just hurt Trent Edwards! haha

-I FUCKING LOVE THOMAS JONES! FANTASY POINTS GONE WILD!

-The Bills are so trash!!

-Giants got so raped.

-LOL!!!!! THE RAIDERS?!?!!?!?!

-If the Jets lose, Ima go apeshit!

-Another int. Sanchez needs to get used to this weather.

-It's never this cold in Mexico

-Andrew called JC Mr Potato Head.

-We have to have johns (excuses) cuz Sanchez is licking balls

-5 for 18 with 3 ints. That's the worst rating ever.

-I fucking love Braylon, TJ, and Washington! Sanchez not so much.

-Sanchez is pissing me off!

-Sanchez is so horrible!

-If ths Bills win I will cry.

-I'm so pissed!

-The Jets D needs to make a big play. (Jets intercept the ball as soon as I write that)

-SPEAK OF THE DEVIL!

-Today shows he hates the cold and Giants Stadium

-Today shows he hates the Jets!

-Sanchez needs to get deported!

-Our fucking QB went all Michael Karkosza and kept throwing it to the other team.

-LOL!!!!! THE BILLS!?!?!??



It's days like these that make me hate being a Jets fan. Plus I lost 5 bucks that should have been guaranteed to me.

Pick-up Line of the Year

Do you have a map?

Because I want to have sex with you.

Hard Times

Hard Times is the new book I'm reading. It's the author - Studs Terkel - interviewing people who experienced the Great Depression first hand. Obviously, it's very depressing. It's not all sad though. There are some cool stories in it; and there are so many different perspectives. There are actually some people who made money during the Depression. Even though I just basically started reading, it's a really good book and I definitely recommend it - especially if you want to witness real life stories of what went on during that time - not just what you read in the textbooks.

My Mother is PISSED!

I just farted so loud that it woke her up. I was in the other room. All I heard from her was, "Dlaczego pierdzis tak kurwa głośno?!?!?!" Which is, "Why do you fart so fucking loud?!?!?!" in Polish.

She is not a happy camper.

Lebron James is a Powerful Motherfucker!

Within 72 hours of punching Lebron James' friend - Edward Givens - Braylon Edwards has been run out of Cleveland and traded to the New York Jets. Now you see the ramifications of fucking with Lebron James and his friends. I'm hoping Braylon Edwards is a good pickup for the Jets.

L Train Delayed After Someone Kills Themself at the 1st Avenue Station

According to Gothamist, someone jumped in front of a Manhattan bound L train on the First Avenue station. The MTA or the NYPD aren't disclosing any information, but they're saying that the L is out of commission until 5 o'clock. It's kind of sad; but what's sadder is that all the comments are people about him. Someone wrote:

"On another note, it's stories like this that show just how selfish people are that commit suicide. He/she could have done it in any other way that did not negatively affect others. But no, he/she decided in his/her own hubris to make sure that his/her death was (a) broadcasted to all and (b) delayed public transportation in a major metropolitan area."

What's saddest of all is that when I heard this, my second thought was, "Poor guy." My first thought was, "How the hell am I gonna get to class today?" Does that make me a bad person? I'm pretty sure it does.

Future Tattoo?

DO YOU LOVE IT, OR DO YOU LOVE IT?!

Spongebob Nazipants

Oy Vey.

I actually filed a complaint to Kellogg's.

My Keys Are Whole Again!

It's not the same Porky Pig keychain, but it's just as awesome.



Thankya Niall!

Seriously?!

Professor: "Can someone name something that caused conflict in the U.S. during the 1960's and 1970's?"

Student: "World War 2?"

I really need to get out of there!

Spicy Meltdown

So I was at Niall's house and we just made chili. I decided to put two whole habanero peppers in a single bowl. So I chopped em all up and put em in the chili. I got a bunch of pepper residue on my hands without noticing so I end up rubbing my eyes. All of a sudden, my eyes start burning ridiculously. I'm stomping all over the place laughing and crying hysterically because of the pain. Niall and his mom are just laughing and trying to get me some water to flush out my eyes. I splashed my eyes with water while still going all crazy and shit. Eventually the pain went away and then I end up scratching my balls without washing my hands of the spicy shit.

I have never felt such a horrid pain before.

On a lighter note, the chili was really good. Kinda spicy, but awesome nonetheless.

Here are some pictures so you can laugh at my pain: