Friend Zone

Why the fuck is it that I always get stuck in the 'friend zone'!? Every time I really like a girl and ask her out, she tells me, "Oh, well I wouldn't wanna lose you as a friend. I know a relationship will screw all of  that up." I mean I can understand sometimes, but I don't wanna be 'just friends' with every girl on the fucking planet.

This even happens with sluts! They tell me they wanna be just friends, while I just wanna have sex with them. Seriously, what kind of shit is that?!

I really don't know what it is, but I'm clearly doing something wrong. I gotta stop being all nice and shit. And I most certainly gotta find a way to stop being Polish (http://fiestas-fiesta.tumblr.com/). I gotta start acting like the Fonz.

AYYYY!!!!

I'm sure some women will see this and call me an asshole. Maybe if you stop putting me in the 'friend zone' I'll stop being such an asshole

Foot

NFL

Ladanian Tomlinson on Monday.

Brian Westbrook on Tuesday.

Thomas Jones on Wednesday?

I'm still debating whether it would be a good thing or not.

Wabbit Season! Duck Season!

This is one of the best things I've seen in a while.

































You gotta love the random, stupid, funny stuff you see in Williamsburg.

Joke of the Week

Why did the golfer have two pairs of socks?




Just in case he got a hole in one.

Teehee







I like Kami's version way better:

Why golfer golf?



Hole in one. 

R.I.P. Big L

Today's the 11th year anniversary of Big L's death. I've been listening to The Big Picture and Livestylez Ov Da Poor and Dangerous all day. I'm not the biggest fan of Hip Hop, but Big L is definitely one of my favorite rappers of all time - if not my favorite.



Rest in Peace.

Thanatophobia

Necrophobia or Thanatophobia is the abnormal fear of death or dead things (e.g., corpses) as well as things associated with death (e.g., coffins). Necrophobia is derived from Greek nekros (νεκρος) for "corpse" and -phob- for "fear". Thanatophobia is derived from Thanatos (θάνατος: "death"), the personification of death.

The more I read about it, the more I think I have Thanathophobia. I'm not really afraid about what's gonna happen after we die  - well not more afraid than any other person. I'm more scared of seeing someone die around me. By that I don't mean having someone emotionally close to me die (although that really scares me too), I mean seeing someone just fall to the floor and die while I'm physically close to them. That thought just horrifies me. This might make me sound like even more of an asshole, but that's why I always take an alternate route whenever I see someone really old next to me. I know the chances of it happening are like 1,000,000:1, but it still haunts me. 

Did You Know?

That is all.

Woop Woop

For some reason I cannot get this song out of my head. I've been singing it for about a week.



Me and Niall keep going, "WOOP WOOP dats the sound of da Police" everytime we see a cop or a cop car. I'm sure we're gonna get in trouble relatively soon.

Phaal Challenge

So me, Danny, Dennis, Gennaro, and Fiesta all decided to go to the Bricklane Curry House for lunch today. We all really wanted to try the Phaal Challenge. It's supposed to be the hottest curry ever. We all get there and our waiter says, "You guys just look like you wanna try the Phaal Challenge, don't you?" We all just laugh and nod. Me and Danny are hesitant at first, but that's only because we see that they have an all you can eat lunch special for 10 bucks - the Phaal alone is 17 bucks (WE IN A RECESSION DOG). After about a minute of everyone there calling us bitches we decide to do it. Gennaro orders lamb, the rest of us order chicken. The waiter suggests we order Mango Lassi. He says it's better than milk to relieve the spiciness. We trust him since we're sure he knows what the fuck he's talking about. After a couple of minutes the Mango Lassi and the Phaal come out. Here's a picture of them:

We dig in! After a bite or two we realize how hot it actually is. It's nowhere near as hot as the Buffalo Cantina wings, but it's still fucking spicy! We all grab for our water. Dennis throws in the towel after a couple of bites. None of us could blame him, but the rest of us really wanted that certificate. I look across the table at Gennaro and he's already soaking in sweat and tearing. I man up and fight through the pain. I'm the first one to finish. The waiter comes by and says, "We have our first Curry Monster!" I get mad gassed and chug the Mango Lassi to get the hot taste out of my mouth. I finish the whole thing in about 20-30 minutes. The next person to finish - Genarro - takes about 90 minutes. Everyone keeps taking one bite, stopping for 10 minutes, then taking another bite. Either I ate it really quick, or they're just bitches. Eventually Fiesta finishes, and then Danny shortly after. We feel like shit, but we're all really proud that we actually did it.

Here's a picture of the four of us:

GLORY!

We so belong on Man Vs. Food! That guy ain't got shit on us!

Bystander Effect

Today I saw a young lady with a big ass baby carriage getting out on the Q train. The baby carriage looked like it weighed more than her! Instead of helping her, I went up a different set of stairs so that I wouldn't have to help her. As I walked by her, I just stared at my iPod so that she wouldn't even have a chance to ask me.
I felt like such a fucking asshole, but I really didn't wanna help her. I'm sure someone - someone who actually has a heart - ended up helping her. The Bystander Effect was totally shown there.


I know it was a dick move, but I'm sure at least 25% of people I know would do the same thing.

200th post! LETS FUCKING GO! I still can't believe I've been doing this shit for over a year. Thought it would die relatively quickly. And it surprises me how many people actually follow/check my blog. Thank you all!

....that's enough of that sentimental shit

Superbowl 44

I can honestly say this is one of the years where I actually do not give a shit about the Superbowl. The two teams are really good and it should be a great game, but I just don't give a fuck. It's probably because the Jets got so close, but came up short. There's no incentive for me to watch this.

Fuck the Saints and Colts. Jets are winning Superbowl 45. Calling that shit right now!

Lent

Lent is coming up soon. At first I wasn't gonna give up anything because I know I'm gonna fuck up. But I did some thinking, and here's a list of things I might give up for Lent.

Spicy Food - so my body can stop hating me 22 HOURS!
Alcohol - for the same reason
Masturbation - for the lulz DON'T JUDGE ME!!
Being late for everything - that shit needs to stop!
Eating shit that's horrible for me
Being so violent and angry all the time

Any other ideas would be greatly appreciated!

The Divine Comedy

So I started reading The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri a couple of weeks ago (Dante's Inferno; Purgatorio; and Paradiso). I've been wanting to read it for a while, but I just never had the time. It's honestly one of the hardest books I've ever read. I personally hate poetry and books written in Old English - The Divine Comedy is both of those in one! As hard as the book is, I'm really enjoying it.

I'm kind of speeding through it, just because I know I'm gonna reread it. Hopefully I get used to it and it won't be such a tough read. I'm planning on finishing Dante's Inferno sometime next week and starting Purgatorio right away.

I highly recommend it, but it's not an easy read at all.

19-0

I think this may be one of my favorite pictures of all time. The NFL sends the SuperBowl loser's apparel to 3rd world countries. I think this can always cheer me up.

Quote of the Week

"What school do you go to?"

"PRATT, PRATT! What it is?!"

Nick Mangold

Everyone says I look like Jets center, Nick Mangold.

 

....I totally see it

Mangold > Nowitzki